ok to be weak
Posted: January 14, 2013 Filed under: cancer, health, pearls of wisdom | Tags: being weak, family, lymph nodes, secrets, thyroid cancer, trust 31 CommentsWhen I grew up we were emotional islands. Hard and strong, bearing each burden silently and separately. It was just the way our family was. I had to learn it is OK to admit to be weak.
Last week I needed a biopsy on a possible cancer reoccurrence in my lymph nodes and scheduled an appointment before my wife could return from out of town. Normally I would have struggled through it alone, but a wise person taught me:
I think you should tell them whenever you’re going through something important. Families are built on sharing and trust and harmed by hiding and secrets.
My daughter asked to accompany me. I agreed. She saw my frustration with those cursed gowns, rolled her eyes when I told them I didn’t need any IV sedative, and waited while they took their fifteen needles of cells out of me.
Afterwards we shared a brilliant breakfast at a local cafe. She had helped, and I had shared my need.
May you be strong enough to admit your weakness, and trust those you love.
bwthoughts 
Those are some wise words, “May you be strong enough to admit your weakness, and trust those you love.” It has always been tough trusting or being strong enough to admit my weaknesses. Every day, I try to with my loved ones. 🙂
thanks Lisa — It’s hard to trust, but without it we can’t really love.
Thank you for keeping your online family informed too, Bill. I’m glad that you let your daughter be there for you. You gave a great gift to her by allowing her to do that. And it sounds as though it worked out pretty well for you, too. ;-D!
Russ
I know, she PAID! I never thought I would see that after college ( smile )
There comes a time to pass the torch to the next generation and accept them as cherished friends.
Brilliant post and brilliant words of wisdom!
thanks, I know some smart people!
Teared up. This and your February posts are the most touching writing I’ve come across lately. Hope really you get the results you hope for as soon as possible!
thanks — If there is one thing I have learned it is to live and love fully. It’s such a great risk. Young and beautiful as you are, enjoy life, but above all be honorable. That’s what the world needs.
I am glad you were not alone. It is hard for me to share my immediate pain with others as well. I am always glad when I do.
Tim
thanks Tim — we aren’t made to be islands, I agree.
Bill, I think there is a great strength in your weakness! Love Resa.
thanks Resa!
😉
weak is soft soft is open open is gifted with the light of the universe
beautifully said.
May you be strong enough to admit your weakness, and trust those you love.
amen.
Good job Shannon!
Tell dad, next time it’s okay to take the IV sedative.
Never mind, I’ll do it myself.
Take the darn sedative next time. You didn’t get named John Wayne. You just a regular Joe named Bill like the rest of us. Nobody has to be, is expected to be, or needs to be, that tough. Sedatives, like family, are there to help, to make us a little more comfortable, and at ease. Like a daughter/adult child’s loving relationship and a good breakfast.
Good luck, man.
Randy
thanks Randy — there may come a time, but not yet ( laughing )
I really appreciate you comments, and your writing.
I have to say this was lovely, even as I am wishing you didn’t have to go through this. I cried. Thank you for sharing this. 🙂
thanks for reading, and for writing such fine poetry.
By allowing me to help you made me feel valuable & included in your life. Plus that was one good breakfast!
maybe it is the moment I recognize you as an adult.
Nice account, Bill. Wish my parents had been like that. They were prideful survivors of The Great Depression and World War II. They kept their secrets well. But you are right, loved ones should be given the opportunity to be loved ones. You hang in there, my friend! 🙂 Eric
thanks — my dad had a hernia for seven years before he told anyone. That was one tough generation.
It’s hard to retrain the brain, but I’m learning.
isn’t that the beauty of being human, we are endlessly adaptable.
Family is a blessing! And being ok to be weak – I totally get where you’re coming from. My thoughts and prayers are with you my friend.
Peace and love,
Diana
thank you Diana, I appreciate it
I’m glad you had company and I’m sending you good vibes to ensure the outcome is a happy, healthy you!
So glad you were not alone, hope results are good ones. Prayers for all Bill!
this is so good.
thanks!